There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader.
ADAM CAROLLAWell, guys are better at mechanical stuff and women are better at emotional stuff.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I didn’t have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.
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I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
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That’s the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can’t pursue your dream till you’re 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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Don’t do your best, do my best.
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He doesn’t sound like a guy who’s done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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The pace of radio is very fast. Boom, boom, with a little six minute segment, then on to the next thing. With podcasts you can talk about something for 25 minutes if you like – there is a lot of artistic freedom with it.
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There’s no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I’m a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.
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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
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I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
ADAM CAROLLA