Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
ADAM CAROLLAFigure out what to do, then take a nap.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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I could definitely see myself making a serious movie or a drama in the future.
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
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So most people don’t have the courage to admit there’s no God and they know it. They feel it. They try to suppress it. And if you bring it up they get angry because it freaks them out.
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Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn’t break it down piece by piece, stage by stage.
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I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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Welfare is monetary methadone.
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I used to be a Democrat, now I’m basically a Republican.
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Don’t do your best, do my best.
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The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.
ADAM CAROLLA