Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.
ADAM CAROLLAI attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
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If you are tuning in just for the show, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
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I am not agnostic. I am atheist. I don’t think there is no God; I know there’s no God. I know there’s no God the same way I know many other laws in our universe.
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Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money – do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
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If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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No one is depressed when they’re being chased by a bear.
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I feel like I’m a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.
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Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
ADAM CAROLLA