We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.
ADAM CAROLLAOf course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
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Rich people don’t pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes – they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn’t pay taxes.
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If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.
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Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!
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California is like the hot blond high school chick who’s been getting by on her looks, but now she’s 45 and falling apart.
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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything; they just don’t vote that way.
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show
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We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it’s not a great way to go.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
ADAM CAROLLA