Welfare is monetary methadone.
ADAM CAROLLAHe doesn’t sound like a guy who’s done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody.
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People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.
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I’m a comedian, not a politician.
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Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they’re so suggestible.
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I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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Rich people don’t pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes – they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn’t pay taxes.
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Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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If you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it’s not a great way to go.
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He doesn’t sound like a guy who’s done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
ADAM CAROLLA