The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
ADAM CAROLLAWhen you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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If you spend your life walking through somebody else’s museum, you never find out whether you’re Rembrandt or not.
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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I’ll never get to do that.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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I’m a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I’m into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
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The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
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We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I don’t normally vote. I’m lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.
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When you have kids, you instantly feel that you do not want to do them wrong. .
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.
ADAM CAROLLA