You don’t cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.
ADAM CAROLLAI’ve always boxed, I always taught boxing.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.
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Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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I’m a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I’m into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
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I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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Here’s what you know: you know when you’re getting laid, and you know when it’s all over. Those are the only two things you’re aware of.
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It’s something I’ve always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.
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The truth is we’re all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else’s book.
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Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
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Life is just the time between crapping yourself.
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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I don’t burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything; they just don’t vote that way.
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No one is depressed when they’re being chased by a bear.
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Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
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Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show
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We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
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Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys.
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I don’t like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
ADAM CAROLLA