When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
ADAM CAROLLAThe truth is we’re all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else’s book.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I’ve worked with women, I’ve never had an issue with women.
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California is like the hot blond high school chick who’s been getting by on her looks, but now she’s 45 and falling apart.
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Honestly, I’ve always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed – that kind of stuff.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
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When you’re doing a radio show, you can express yourself.
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We’re always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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I don’t have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.
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If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.
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If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?
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If you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course… Real estate values go ‘boom!’
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I get depressed at airports.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.
ADAM CAROLLA