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But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.

Adam Carolla

Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn’t break it down piece by piece, stage by stage.
ADAM CAROLLA

Back Believe Build Door Job Overwhelming Stand Stuff
Those dads that go off to Florida and start a new life, I couldn’t imagine that: seeing my kid once every Christmas, every three years. If I’m gone for six days it feels like too much
ADAM CAROLLA

Christmas Country Dad Every Imagine Seeing Three Year
People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
ADAM CAROLLA

College Look People Smart White
If you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
ADAM CAROLLA

Conservative Hollywood Need People Place
I get depressed at airports.
ADAM CAROLLA

Airport Depress Depressed Fear Height Scare Shy
I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Attempted Comedy Good Stand Up Very
Whoever is for higher taxes, feel free to pay higher taxes.
ADAM CAROLLA

Feel Free Higher Pay Tax
I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
ADAM CAROLLA

Fake Funny Humor None Orgasm Two Type Women
Maybe I’m delusional but I’m usually funny. It’s not 100% but I have a pretty good batting average.
ADAM CAROLLA

Average Batting Delusional Good Hundred Percentage Pretty
You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
ADAM CAROLLA

Anything Eating Funny Humor Microwave Six Take
We’ve got black and white, we’ve got Hispanic and Asian, we got gay, straight, and Guttenberg, all working together for one common goal: to get the mirror ball.
ADAM CAROLLA

Asian Black Hispanic Straight Together White Working
When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
ADAM CAROLLA

Base Funny Include Kind King Revise Sex Sexual Sexy
I’d never hurt another person.
ADAM CAROLLA

Another Calm Heart Hurt People Person Pure
I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
ADAM CAROLLA

Money Myself Plenty Want Working
I don’t like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it’s the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they’re pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
ADAM CAROLLA

Biggest Coffee Soccer Soft Thinking Whatever World
I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
ADAM CAROLLA

Ability Field Healthcare Playing Right Thinking Work

But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.

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But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn’t imagine it.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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