“. It’s an even wooden floor, and may the best man or woman win. And I say God bless Dancing with the Stars, and God bless the USA.”

The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.

The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I’m not sure why.

Don’t do your best, do my best.

If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.

I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much. Some people do. It takes a certain breed of cat. .

I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.

I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.

There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader.

Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can’t just throw your hands up and enjoy it.

If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife’s side of the bed at night.

Telling them to stop isn’t going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.

The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.

I don’t think healthcare’s a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.

I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.

Life is just the time between crapping yourself.

We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.

I really love going back home. I think going back to a nice, relaxed little town is the best way to do it.

The lives of most men are patchwork quilts. Or at best one matching outfit with a closet and laundry bag full of incongruous accumulations. A lifetime of training for just ten seconds.

The sun will stand as your best man And whistle When you have found the courage To marry forgiveness When you have found the courage to marry Love.

If Zizou kept his temper, he would not be the genius that he is.

The study of History is the best medicine for a sick mind.

My parents make sure we have everything we need so that we compete to the best of our abilities.

When you do something best in life, you don’t really want to give that up – and for me it’s tennis.

If I could apologise and go back and change history I would do. But the goal is still a goal, Argentina became world champions and I was the best player in the world