Nobody ever says, Can I have your beets?
BILL COSBYAll parents experience the same problems.
More Bill Cosby Quotes
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Violence won’t solve a thing. It makes it more challenging to solve, though.
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Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.
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A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.
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I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.
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In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to discipline a child is still a mystery to most fathers and mothers Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
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You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
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And so the dentist says ‘Rinse.’ So you lean over, and you’re lookin’ at this miniature toilet bowl.
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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
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Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
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Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
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Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
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Man can not live by bread alone, he must have peanut butter.
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I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
BILL COSBY