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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Mark Twain

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
MARK TWAIN

Bank Banker Fellow Lend Rain Shine Sun Sunshine Umbrella
Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
MARK TWAIN

Eat Frog Funny Humour Morning
I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
MARK TWAIN

Decision Humour Mind
I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
MARK TWAIN

Happen Humour Life Live Terrible
A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN

Honesty Lying Shoes Travel Truth World
The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
MARK TWAIN

Death Die Fear Inspirational Life Live Man Prepare Time Travel
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.
MARK TWAIN

Give Up Human Nature Humour Smoking Time World
It’s better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt.
MARK TWAIN

Appearance Doubt Humour Mouth Remove Stupidity
What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
MARK TWAIN

Create Disappointment Father Heaven Humour Man Monkey
A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.
MARK TWAIN

Book Humour Success Writing
In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.
MARK TWAIN

Education God Humour Idiot Practice School
Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.
MARK TWAIN

Fiction Possible Stick StrAngry Truth
A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
MARK TWAIN

Bad Conscience Memories Past
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
MARK TWAIN

Ambition Dreamss Greatness Hurt People Try
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
MARK TWAIN

Born Inspirational Life Positive Reason Success Wisdom
I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
MARK TWAIN

Humour Letter Time Writing

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

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Popular Authors

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