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Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.

Bob Hope

I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
BOB HOPE

Aircraft Asked Bob Obsolete Type Worry
I can’t give up Golf, I’ve got too many sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Giving Golf Sweaters Up
Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
BOB HOPE

Careers Dying Line One
He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England
BOB HOPE

Country Good Line Look One
Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you’re God’s frozen people.
BOB HOPE

Frozen Guy People
I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
BOB HOPE

One Should Taxes Travel Years
If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
BOB HOPE

Fighting Games Golf
Please don’t stand up on my account.
BOB HOPE

Account Line One Please Stand
For the first time, you can actually see the losers turn green
BOB HOPE

Firsts Green Oscars
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
BOB HOPE

Doors Even Garage Love Makin Next
I’ll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
BOB HOPE

Age Golf Live Shoot
Eighty is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender. Or when you wake up as many times during the night as Burt Reynolds, but not for the same reason.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Night Reason Same
The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
BOB HOPE

Aspiration Funny Presidential Running States
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
BOB HOPE

Happiness Inspirational Laughter
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE

Christmas Holiday Old Fashioned Xmas
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE

Boxes Entertainment Television

Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.

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Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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