You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
ADAM CAROLLAToss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I don’t like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
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I’d be at someone’s house or be up on the roof all day and I’d get lonely – stir crazy – and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life.
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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.
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I’m not sexist, I’m just a realist.
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My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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Screw guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
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Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show
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I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
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I swear my car won’t run unless I’m picking my nose: At least, I’m that superstitious about it, so I don’t want to take any chances.
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People are stupid. There’s a lot of dumb stuff that’s successful.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
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This is why the terrorists hate us. And it’s not the glitter and it’s not the pomp and circumstance.
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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.
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If you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
ADAM CAROLLA