I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARXMan does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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I intend to live forever, or die trying.
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Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
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Whatever it is, I’m against it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
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I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
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Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
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Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
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If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX