Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERSEverything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERSIf there are no dogs on Heaven, then when I die, I want to go where they went.
WILL ROGERSSometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.
WILL ROGERSAlways drink upstream from the herd.
WILL ROGERSYou know horses are smarter than people. You never heard of a horse going broke betting on people.
WILL ROGERSI don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
WILL ROGERSAll I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.
WILL ROGERSThe only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.
WILL ROGERSThere is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.
WILL ROGERSThe road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
WILL ROGERSThe more ignorant you are, the quicker you fight.
WILL ROGERSMake crime pay. Become a lawyer.
WILL ROGERSNo man is great if he thinks he is.
WILL ROGERSBe thankful we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.
WILL ROGERSA fool and his money are soon elected.
WILL ROGERSWork to make a living; serve to make a life.
WILL ROGERS