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An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

Will Rogers

There is one guaranteed formula for failure, and that is to try to please everyone.
WILL ROGERS

Failure Formula Guarantee Please Try
You must judge a man’s greatness by how much he will be missed.
WILL ROGERS

Greatness Judgment Man Missing
There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
WILL ROGERS

Funny Humor Theory Woman
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
WILL ROGERS

Business Experience Inspirational Judgment
Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans.
WILL ROGERS

Politics Reason Vote
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don’t let it get the best of you.
WILL ROGERS

Experience Happen Hard Time Inspirational
People’s minds are changed through observation and not through argument.
WILL ROGERS

Argument Change Mind Observation People
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.
WILL ROGERS

Ignorance Newspaper Reading
The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn’t still be a farmer.
WILL ROGERS

Farmer Optimistic
Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERS

Funny Happen Hard Time Tragedy
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
WILL ROGERS

Death Grandfather Peace Scream Sleep
People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
WILL ROGERS

Fly People Rage
Don’t gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don’t go up, don’t buy it.
WILL ROGERS

Buy Gamble Save Sell Stock Market
We always want the best man to win an election. Unfortunately, he never runs.
WILL ROGERS

Election Man Politics Unfortunate
There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
WILL ROGERS

Learning Men Observation Reading Stupidity
An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
WILL ROGERS

Cry Laugh Onion People Vegetable

An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

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An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

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