black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I drink therefore I am.

W. C. Fields

I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDS

Habit Mad Myself Weird
I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Bad Children Hate
I’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDS

Equality Freedom Hate Myself
I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Vote
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.
W. C. FIELDS

Drive Grateful Myself Reason
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS

Deep Reality Tragedy
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. FIELDS

Ambitious Myself Tree
Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
W. C. FIELDS

Food Funny
If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Live Myself
The only thing a lawyer won’t question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. FIELDS

Himself Mom
Yes I do like children, Girl children, about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself Woman
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Hate See

I drink therefore I am.

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I drink therefore I am.

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