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Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’

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I installed a skylight in my apartment, the people who live above me are furious!
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Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
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I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, “Got any shoes you’re not using?
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