God made night, But man made darkness.
SPIKE MILLIGANI’m Irish. We think sideways.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
SPIKE MILLIGAN