Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
SPIKE MILLIGANI cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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I told you I was sick.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGAN