A lot of learning can be a little thing.
SPIKE MILLIGANRender any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
SPIKE MILLIGAN