It never dawned on me that I had the option of becoming a comedian. I come from a little dirt street town in northwest Texas, and they really don’t talk about the arts there much on career day.
RON WHITEEverybody I know is a joke writer.
More Ron White Quotes
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I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.
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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
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I was by far the least popular of the Blue Collar crew when we started. There was a definite pecking order, and everybody knew it.
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Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
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I would have rather been beat by a plumber than Kathy Griffin.
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Anything I write that I consider stage-quality work, I won’t give my TV show. I put it in my live show.
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Comedy is great because there’s no overhead.
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I don’t have a specific plan except for as long as people want to listen to me talk, I’m going to keep talking. I can’t imagine a life without doing standup.
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Mother, she likes the blue material just fine.
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You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
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I always found that the closer I got to who I really am, on stage, the more they responded to it.
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When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
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I go through about 140 cities a year.
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I was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.
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I’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
RON WHITE