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My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

Rodney Dangerfield

Related Topics

Calendar Day Get Jealous Look May Other Ridiculous Want Wife

Bagwalas

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
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Back Car Drive Want Wife
My cousin’s gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
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Men who do things without being told draw the most wages.
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If it wasn’t for pick-pockets I’d have no sex life at all.
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All Life Pick Pocket Sex
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous – everyone hasn’t met me yet.
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My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
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Around Came Carry Father Picture Wallet
What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.
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Arm Bone Dog Favorite My
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
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Father Finger Kidnap More Piece Proof Remember Sent Time Want
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
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It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass.
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When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
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I’m at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I’ve just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
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I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
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Cheat Good Goodness Kid Look Me Wife
I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
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My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.
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