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My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.

Rodney Dangerfield

Related Topics

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Bagwalas

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When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Born Doctor Mother Slap Ugly
My wife was afraid of the dark… then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.
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Afraid Dark Light Me Naked Saw Wife
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
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Everyone Fruit Laugh Loom Met Morning Underwear
I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.
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Get Honest No Politician Respect Run
I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.
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Another Came Cement Felt Hand Neighborhood Real Some Tough
My uncle’s dying wish – he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.
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Brown Sie Told Uncle Wear Wish Yellow
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Again Boyfriend Broke Her Marriage Trock Up Wife
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
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Father Finger Kidnap More Piece Proof Remember Sent Time Want
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
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Attack Control Girl Last Myself Night Save
My cousin’s gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
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Ben Big Clock Country Cousin Find Gay
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Bath Hate Parent Radio Toast Toy
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages.
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Being Do Draw Men Most Thing Told Wage
One year they asked me to be poster boy – for birth control.
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Ask Birth Boy Control One Poster Year
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
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Crazy Opinion Psychiatrist Said Second
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
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Country Dog Every Leave Pyramid Room Some
With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we’ll never see each other!
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Each Other Every Goe never Night Nothing Psychiatrist Right Seen Sex Wife

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