Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
NORM MACDONALDThe most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
-
-
Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
NORM MACDONALD -
The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
NORM MACDONALD -
We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
NORM MACDONALD -
Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
NORM MACDONALD -
When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
NORM MACDONALD -
There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
NORM MACDONALD -
In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
NORM MACDONALD -
I generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
NORM MACDONALD -
Few people love with the violence they hate.
NORM MACDONALD -
All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
NORM MACDONALD -
I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
NORM MACDONALD -
Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
NORM MACDONALD -
I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you’re all right. I don’t have to go to premières.
NORM MACDONALD -
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
NORM MACDONALD -
I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
NORM MACDONALD