You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALDThe most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
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A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
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Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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As evacuation eases the body, so occasional ejectment of passion seems to appease the agonies of the soul, and dispose to tranquility the agitations of the heart.
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The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
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We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
NORM MACDONALD