Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
NORM MACDONALDReason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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When people told the audience that [Sam Kinison] was good, he was accepted after that.
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Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
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Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
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As evacuation eases the body, so occasional ejectment of passion seems to appease the agonies of the soul, and dispose to tranquility the agitations of the heart.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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Though we may not desire to detect fraud, we must not, on that account, endeavor to be insensible of it, for, as cunning is a crime, so is duplicity a fault, and if men dread knaves, they also despise fools.
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
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There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
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Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.
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The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them.
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There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
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All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
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The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.
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The reason we have few friends in adversity, is, because we have no true ones in prosperity.
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Back in the old days, a man could just get sick and die. Now they have to wage a battle. So my Uncle Bert is waging a courageous battle, which I’ve seen, because I go and visit him. And this is the battle: he’s lying in the hospital bed, with a thing in his arm, watching Matlock on the TV.
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Enjoyment inflames love in some men, and extinguishes it in others: the wind that assists large vessels, upsets small ones.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
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If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it.
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I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
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It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
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Instead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
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A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another; but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
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I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
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You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALD