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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.

Norm MacDonald

A readiness to excuse some faults, shows a disposition to commit others.
NORM MACDONALD

Commitment Display Excuse Mistake
Flattery succeeds best on minds previously occupied by conceit.
NORM MACDONALD

Best Mindset Praise Success
Enjoyment inflames love in some men, and extinguishes it in others: the wind that assists large vessels, upsets small ones.
NORM MACDONALD

Enjoyment Love Man Small Wind
He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
NORM MACDONALD

Himself Praise Search
Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
NORM MACDONALD

Action Change Practice Principle Thinking
Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
NORM MACDONALD

Afraid Destroy People Trust
Most men will go farther to give advice than to follow their own opinion.
NORM MACDONALD

Advice Man Opinion
When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
NORM MACDONALD

Battle Courageous Defeat Failure Hero Himself Lost Man Sick
The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
NORM MACDONALD

Different Moral Nation Reading
Back in the old days, a man could just get sick and die. Now they have to wage a battle. So my Uncle Bert is waging a courageous battle, which I’ve seen, because I go and visit him. And this is the battle: he’s lying in the hospital bed, with a thing in his arm, watching Matlock on the TV.
NORM MACDONALD

Battle Day Death Funny Hospital Man Myself Old Sick
You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALD

Hate Love Rival Team Yourself
The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
NORM MACDONALD

Action Affect Deep Future Ourselves Regret
During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them.
NORM MACDONALD

Condition Deserve Misfortune Ourselves
I don’t have any ambition.
NORM MACDONALD

Ambition Myself One Liner
It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
NORM MACDONALD

Fortune Policy Wasted Time
Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.
NORM MACDONALD

Confidence Easy Man Temptation Violence
There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
NORM MACDONALD

Grief Man Mistake Virtue
Chastity is oftener owing to diffidence and shame, than to fortitude of reason or virtue.
NORM MACDONALD

Philosophy Reason Shame Virtue
I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
NORM MACDONALD

Care Exercise Preference Sex Win Yourself
A suspicious person is the rival of him that deceives, both seem to practice a knowledge of cunning device, and equable sense of disengenuous merit.
NORM MACDONALD

Device Equality Knowledge Person Practice
Though we may not desire to detect fraud, we must not, on that account, endeavor to be insensible of it, for, as cunning is a crime, so is duplicity a fault, and if men dread knaves, they also despise fools.
NORM MACDONALD

Betrayal Crime Desire Fake Fools Man Philosophy
Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
NORM MACDONALD

Behavior Hate Love Mental People Violence
Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
NORM MACDONALD

Correct Discover Improvement Mistake Yourself
I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
NORM MACDONALD

Comedy Identity Joke Myself Perfection
I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
NORM MACDONALD

Enough Funny Myself Natural Reality Sound
All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
NORM MACDONALD

Business Confidence Disappointment Future Learning People Weakness
It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
NORM MACDONALD

Adversity Better Desire Destroy Necessary Prosperity Ruin

Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.

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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.

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