Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
MARK TWAINNever allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
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The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
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The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
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Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.
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When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
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Loyalty to country always. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
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In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.
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Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
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When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
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Obscurity and a competence – that is the life that is best worth living.
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Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.
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In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
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My books are water; those of the great geniuses is wine. Everybody drinks water.
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Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.
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I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
MARK TWAIN