The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
KIN HUBBARDWhen you consider what a chance women have to poison their husbands, it’s a wonder there isn’t more of it done
More Kin Hubbard Quotes
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It’s what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.
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One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.
KIN HUBBARD -
Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.
KIN HUBBARD -
On a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.
KIN HUBBARD -
The worst waste of breath, next to playing a saxophone, is advising a son
KIN HUBBARD -
Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.
KIN HUBBARD -
No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
KIN HUBBARD -
The longer it takes you to select a cantaloupe, the worse it is!
KIN HUBBARD -
A loafer always has the correct time.
KIN HUBBARD -
Look out for the people who allow you to do all the talking.
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Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it’s by applause.
KIN HUBBARD -
I’m sorry to inform you that your 50 year warranty has expired on your back, knees, and memory.
KIN HUBBARD -
Never tell the box-office man that you can’t hear well or he will sell you a seat where you can’t see either.
KIN HUBBARD -
When a woman says, ‘I don’t wish to mention any names’, it means it ain’t necessary to mention any names.
KIN HUBBARD -
A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.
KIN HUBBARD