“Lots of fellows think a home is only good to borrow money on.”

The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

Ther’s still a few honest folks left but they never seem t’ find anything you lose.

Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.

The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.

Luckily your lifetime warranty on your heart is still in effect. Of course, that becomes void and expires when you do.

Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.

There is plenty of peace in any home where the family doesn’t make the mistake of trying to get together.

Washing your car and polishing it all up is a never failing sign of rain.

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has traveled is the worst.

Don’t knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while.

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

There’s another advantage to being poor – a doctor will cure you faster.

Some folks seem to have descended from the chimpanzee much later than others.

A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.

My idea of walking into the jaws of death is marrying some woman who has lost three husbands.

We don’t just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.

Put down the pen someone else gave you. No one ever drafted a life worth living on borrowed ink.

I should have known the moment your lips met mine that we were having an affair with borrowed time.

Good debt growth is when you borrow money, and it goes into the real economy. You do capital spending. You build businesses.

If you’re running a business for the long term, the last thing you should be doing is borrowing money to buy back stock.

We used to be hunter-gatherers, now we’re shopper-borrowers.

My heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue. All’s well that ends well, to end up with you.

Worry is the interest paid by those who borrow trouble.