Never tell the box-office man that you can’t hear well or he will sell you a seat where you can’t see either.
KIN HUBBARDThe election is not very far off when a candidate can recognize you across the street.
More Kin Hubbard Quotes
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There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?
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When a woman says, ‘I don’t wish to mention any names’, it means it ain’t necessary to mention any names.
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Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.
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There is plenty of peace in any home where the family doesn’t make the mistake of trying to get together.
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When some fellers decide to retire nobody knows the difference.
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One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.
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If you haven’t seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven’t seen her smile her prettiest.
KIN HUBBARD -
Intelligent people are always on the unpopular side of anything.
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Only one fellow in ten thousand understands the currency question, and we meet him every day.
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Luckily your lifetime warranty on your heart is still in effect. Of course, that becomes void and expires when you do.
KIN HUBBARD -
It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.
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There is no failure except in no longer trying.
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Some people pay a compliment as if they expected a receipt.
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If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.
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Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.
KIN HUBBARD -
The worst waste of breath, next to playing a saxophone, is advising a son
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Very often the quiet fellow has said all he knows
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A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.
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There’s another advantage to being poor – a doctor will cure you faster.
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No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
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If there’s anything mean in a feller, a litter authority will bring it out.
KIN HUBBARD -
The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
KIN HUBBARD -
It ain’t a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you’re talking about.
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An optimist is a fellow who believes what’s going to be will be postponed
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Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.
KIN HUBBARD -
Nobuddy ever listened t’ reason on a empty stomach.
KIN HUBBARD