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I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.

Bob Hope

A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE

Men One Line Religious
I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Love People Witty
Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
BOB HOPE

Culture Hands Moving
I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
BOB HOPE

Home Marriage Years
I just hope I don’t have to explain all the times I’ve used His name in vain when I get up there.
BOB HOPE

Get Golf Names Vain
I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
BOB HOPE

Although Beautiful Girl Lucky Over Thing Whole
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous Old
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration
One of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we’ll have her forever.
BOB HOPE

Balls Forever Gifts Good Greatest Laughter Thank
And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny People Sorry War
It’s a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he’s dead.
BOB HOPE

Average Funny Humorous
Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
BOB HOPE

Anything Resist Temptation
The high point of the act is when he (Uri Durov) puts his head inside the bear’s huge jaws. I wouldn’t even try that with my agent.
BOB HOPE

Act Agents Funny High Inside Trying
Television. That’s where movies go when they die.
BOB HOPE

Country Dies Movie People Television
Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here – just for me.
BOB HOPE

Appreciate Want War Winding
If I had that kind of money, I wouldn’t come to Vietnam, I’d send for it.
BOB HOPE

Country Kind Line Money One People

I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.

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I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.

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Popular Authors

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