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The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

Bob Hope

You know you’ve reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
BOB HOPE

Age Country Middle People Weightlifting
If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPE

Golf Relax Right Thinking
Having so many gold courses so close together was ideal for me. With my slice I could enjoy three or four golf courses at the same time.
BOB HOPE

Funny Golf Same Time Together
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE

Country Day Every Get Over People
A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE

Men One Line Religious
Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
BOB HOPE

Healing Mean Wonderful
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous Old
I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Love People Witty
England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there.
BOB HOPE

England Funny Humorous Performance
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE

Christmas Holiday Old Fashioned Xmas
I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Money People
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
BOB HOPE

Dieting Friend Good Loss Weight
I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don’t they just print our money with a return address on it?
BOB HOPE

Addresses Government Perfect Return
Perfume acts as an anesthetic. By the time she floats a little your way, you’ll promise her anything.
BOB HOPE

Country Littles People Promise Way
My secret for staying young is good food, plenty of rest, and a makeup man with a spray gun.
BOB HOPE

Gun Makeup Men Spray
Television. That’s where movies go when they die.
BOB HOPE

Country Dies Movie People Television

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

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The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

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