On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag.
BOB HOPEEverybody knows what California smog is – that’s fog with the vitamins removed.
More Bob Hope Quotes
-
-
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE -
The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
BOB HOPE -
Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don’t worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
BOB HOPE -
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
BOB HOPE -
There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
BOB HOPE -
America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.
BOB HOPE -
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
BOB HOPE -
Audiences are my best friends. You never tire of talking with your best friends.
BOB HOPE -
You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor’s age by the rings on her fingers.
BOB HOPE -
Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it’s also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.
BOB HOPE -
We had a very successful trip to Russia. We made it back.
BOB HOPE -
The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
BOB HOPE -
I’ve always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.
BOB HOPE -
I see the Beatles have arrived from England. They were 40 pounds overweight – and that was just their hair.
BOB HOPE -
Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes.
BOB HOPE