Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
BOB HOPEBigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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One of our stock lines used to be “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Bing, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me.” And that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other!
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I see the Beatles have arrived from England. They were 40 pounds overweight – and that was just their hair.
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If I had that kind of money, I wouldn’t come to Vietnam, I’d send for it.
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Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
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We had a very successful trip to Russia. We made it back.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’
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It’s not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course – you just follow the wounded.
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I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
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The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
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Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
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By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.
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I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don’t they just print our money with a return address on it?
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On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag.
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Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
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The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
BOB HOPE