The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
BOB HOPEI asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I was lucky I wasn’t a better boxer, or that’s what I’d be now – a punchy ex-pug.
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I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.
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When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
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The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn’t got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
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We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.
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Timing is the essence of life, and definitely of comedy.
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It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn’t know they had a caddie division.
BOB HOPE -
Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn’t hear them.
BOB HOPE -
People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
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Failure is the only thing I’ve ever been a success at.
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My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
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Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.
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She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
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England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there.
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She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.
BOB HOPE