The younger generation is supposed to rage against the machine, not for it. They’re supposed to question authority, not question those who question authority.
BILL MAHERIf you believe Jesus ever had a good word for war or torture or tax cuts for the rich, or raping the earth, or refusing water to dying migrants, then you might as well believe bunnies lay painted eggs.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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Death is nature’s way of killing you.
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Who takes care of their people better? FEMA or Hezbollah?
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The Drug War is an addiction, really.
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Halloween is a day when we all get to fool people into thinking we’re someone else. Or as Mitt Romney calls it, campaigning.
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To those people who say, ‘My father is alive because of animal experimentation,’ I say, ‘Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.’ Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
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What is it with conservatives? Seriously, I’m not trying to be partisan but it seems like if they’re anti-illegal alien, they have illegal aliens working for them. If they’re anti-gay, they turn out to be gay. If they’re super Christian, they’re a witch.
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If you think you have it tough, read history books.
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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
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When I see the toothless guy, as a liberal, what I say is, ‘I want to help you get teeth.’ Why does that make me an a**hole?
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There is no debate here, just scientists and non-scientists. And since the subject is science, the non-scientists don’t get a vote.
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If Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?
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Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don’t need.
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If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.
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We don’t really have to make fun of religion – it makes fun of itself.
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Maybe a president who didn’t believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.
BILL MAHER