At some point in the last 20 years, the left moved to the center, and the right moved into a mental institution.
BILL MAHERIf Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?
More Bill Maher Quotes
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If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.
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I don’t know anyone less Jesus like than Christians.
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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
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There is no debate here, just scientists and non-scientists. And since the subject is science, the non-scientists don’t get a vote.
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Only a Bush could answer a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question two different ways and be wrong both times.
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The cable TV sex channels don’t expand our horizons, don’t make us better people, and don’t come in clearly enough.
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The plain fact is: religion must die for mankind to live.
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Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
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The Drug War is an addiction, really.
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Talk to women who’ve ever dated an Arab man. The results are not good.
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You can always tell when Obama’s negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he’s missing his watch and his lunch money.
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Jim Bakker spells his name with two k’s because three would be too obvious.
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When you get people who are out of office, suddenly their tongues loosen up and suddenly they say the things that you wish they’d said or did when they were in office.
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In Europe, Socialism is just another political party. It just means that government takes over certain things like hospitals, prisons, military and schools that should not be run for profit.
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The answer isn’t another pill. The answer is spinach.
BILL MAHER