Emergency rooms will be used the way they were intended to be used: not for primary care, but for when the average freaky American get some strange object up his ass.
BILL MAHERAt some point in the last 20 years, the left moved to the center, and the right moved into a mental institution.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.
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The whole dating ritual was different when I was a kid. Girls got pinned, not nailed.
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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
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Idiots must stop claiming that atheism is a religion. Religion is defined as the belief in and worship of a superhuman controlling power. And atheism is… precisely not that. Atheism is a religion like abstinence is a sex position.
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They’re talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that’s used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can’t even smoke in bed.
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Curious people are interesting people, I wonder why that is.
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To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.
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As you go down the path of life, ask whats true. Not who else believes it.
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If anti-gay stuff is always coming out of your mouth, something very gay is probably going in.
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There is no debate here, just scientists and non-scientists. And since the subject is science, the non-scientists don’t get a vote.
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The cable TV sex channels don’t expand our horizons, don’t make us better people, and don’t come in clearly enough.
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I don’t know anyone less Jesus like than Christians.
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To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click ‘I Agree’.
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Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
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The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.
BILL MAHER