“If you believe that the world is going to come to an end – and perhaps any day now – does it not drain one’s motivation to improve life on earth while we’re here?”

In an average moral universal society, good people will try to do the right thing, and psychotic people will do wicked things. But if you want to make good people do wicked things, you need them to be religious.

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make in order to become the wiser person we became.

You can always tell when Obama’s negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he’s missing his watch and his lunch money.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

The First Amendment was specifically designed for citizens to insult politicians. Libel laws were written to protect law students speaking out on political issues from getting called whores by Oxycontin addicts.

The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.

Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’

Things aren’t right. If a burglar breaks into your home and you shoot him, he can sue you. For what, restraint of trade?

Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

A new cologne is coming out. It’s for cowboys, and it’s made from cow’s manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!

During the Depression, or back when we were fighting Hitler, people didn’t have time to sue a company if the coffee was too hot. There were urgent, pressing problems. If you think you have it tough, read history books.

If you think you have it tough, read history books.

Did you see the 2000 Republican Presidential Convention? The last time the Republicans had that many Black people on a stage, they were selling them!

Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?

You have to have trust in someone you’re working with; otherwise, you’re not gonna come out with something that’s really you.

You can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent.

I do not believe in God and I am not an atheist.

I’m in love with love and totally believe in marriage, but that’s not even on my radar right now. I am not putting energy into dating.

Anyone who does not believe in miracles is not a realist.

I’ve come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.

Always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who will, sweetie

Everyone deserves to believe they are beautiful.