It’s not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That’s predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.
BILL MAHERIn Europe, Socialism is just another political party. It just means that government takes over certain things like hospitals, prisons, military and schools that should not be run for profit.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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Funny that all of Nixon’s crimes – anonymous campaign cash, wiretapping, undeclared wars – are all legal now. Discuss.
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In this country your guilty until proven wealthy.
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Trusting the government to monitor your calls without listening. It’s kind of like trusting Chris Christie to pick up the McDonald’s and not eat the fries on the way home.
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Anyone who tells you that they know, they just know what happens when you die, I promise you, you dont. How can I be so sure? Because I dont know and you do not possess mental powers that I do not.
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We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It’s overrun with sheep and conformists.
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I have always defined political correctness as an elevation of sensitivity over truth.
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God knows life sucks. It’s right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, “I can’t take away pain and misery because then no one would talk to me.”
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Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’
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Just honest. To me, being ‘politically incorrect’ means the opposite of being political — which means to spin everything. That’s all it’s ever meant to me. It’s never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.
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To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.
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Jim Bakker spells his name with two k’s because three would be too obvious.
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I always compare marriage to communism. They’re both institutions that don’t conform to human nature, so you’re going to end up with lying and hypocrisy.
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If you think you have it tough, read history books.
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As you go down the path of life, ask whats true. Not who else believes it.
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I feel terrible for a Palestinian child who dies. But, if it’s your father, your brother or your uncle who was firing those rockets into Israel, whose fault is it really? Do you really expect the Israelis not to retaliate?
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The whole dating ritual was different when I was a kid. Girls got pinned, not nailed.
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I don’t know anyone less Jesus like than Christians.
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Let’s make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake – you know, to send the right message to kids.
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When opportunity knocks all some people can do is complain about the noise.
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The plain fact is: religion must die for mankind to live.
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I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.
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Death is nature’s way of killing you.
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America is like a dog. I’m sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can’t actually explain issues to a dog.
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Things aren’t right. If a burglar breaks into your home and you shoot him, he can sue you. For what, restraint of trade?
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Hollywood isn’t your cesspool, America. It’s your mirror.
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There is no debate here, just scientists and non-scientists. And since the subject is science, the non-scientists don’t get a vote.
BILL MAHER