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I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.

Bill Cosby

And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl there’s a little voice that say, ‘I wonder where he would go if it hadn’t been for his head.
BILL COSBY

Death Himself See Voice Yourself
Human beings are the only creatures on earth who allow their kids to come back home.
BILL COSBY

Children Home Human
No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
BILL COSBY

Children Ordinary Parents Talk
Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.
BILL COSBY

Children Development Music Time Weird
The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
BILL COSBY

Children End Friendship Myself Play
Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.
BILL COSBY

Justice Parents Peace Quiet
Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
BILL COSBY

Fun Yourself
When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first?
BILL COSBY

Deep Dream One Liner Wake Up Yourself
It is a point of pride for the American male to keep the same size jockey shorts for his entire life.
BILL COSBY

Life Man Pride
The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
BILL COSBY

Avoid Law Promise
All parents experience the same problems.
BILL COSBY

Experience Parents Problem
Give me 200 active 2-year-olds and I could conquer the world.
BILL COSBY

Myself World
You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don’t want to see the dog doing them.
BILL COSBY

Dog Teaching Yourself
The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.
BILL COSBY

Gift God Heart Marriage Memories Relationship
Decide that you want it more than you’re afraid of it.
BILL COSBY

Decision Fear Yourself
I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.
BILL COSBY

Eat Myself Pieces

I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.

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I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.

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