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If I’d known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can’t remember a single project I would have started.

Andy Rooney

The best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
ANDY ROONEY

Class Person Room World
Don’t you hate it when, your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?
ANDY ROONEY

Hate Last Luggage Oneself Yourself
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
ANDY ROONEY

Enjoyment Growth Television Watch
I’ve learned, That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
ANDY ROONEY

Adult Block Children Father Simple Summer Walk Wonder
In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.
ANDY ROONEY

Book Difficult Live Surround
My most serious character flaw is that I don’t deny myself much.
ANDY ROONEY

Character Flaw Myself Serious
The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete.
ANDY ROONEY

Computer Fast Technology
Don’t rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.
ANDY ROONEY

Hands Head Rule World Yourself
I just wish this social institution [religion] wasnt based on what appears to me to be a monumental hoax built on an accumulation of customs and myths directed toward proving something that isnt true.
ANDY ROONEY

Custom Direction Evidence Institution Monument Myself Myth Social
I’d like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off.
ANDY ROONEY

Enough Funny Letter Money Myself Rich
Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness Kill Old Oneself People Return Time World
Nothing in fine print is ever good news.
ANDY ROONEY

Goodness News Print
I’ve learned that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
ANDY ROONEY

Deserve Learning Myself Smile
I had one typewriter for 50 years, but I have bought seven computers in six years. I suppose that’s why Bill Gates is rich, and Underwood is out of business.
ANDY ROONEY

Business Computer Myself Writing
I’ve learned, That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
ANDY ROONEY

Appreciation Learning Life Myself Small
The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!
ANDY ROONEY

Big Bookstore Diet Eat Yourself

If I’d known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can’t remember a single project I would have started.

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If I’d known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can’t remember a single project I would have started.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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