Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
AMBROSE BIERCEOptimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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