PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
AMBROSE BIERCEA person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
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