Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
AMBROSE BIERCEPITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
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The covers of this book are too far apart.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
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