An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
AMBROSE BIERCEDeath is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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