“REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.”

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.

Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.

Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.

IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.

LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.

Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.

Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.

You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.

No matter how the wind howls. The mountain cannot bow to it

So in war, the way is to avoid what is strong, and strike at what is weak.

Avoidable human misery is more often caused not so much by stupidity as by ignorance, particularly our ignorance about ourselves.

We all dread a bodily paralysis, and would make use of every contrivance to avoid it; but none of us is troubled about a paralysis of the soul.

The moon stays bright when it doesn’t avoid the night.

Cultivate your curves – they may be dangerous but they won’t be avoided.

I generally avoid temptation unless I can’t resist it.

Avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.