Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
AMBROSE BIERCEThe covers of this book are too far apart.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
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IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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